De one with Silent Prayers

Silent night

Despite persistence to clutch our own destinies, certain things in life are uncontrollable. As much as I refused to make believe, perhaps the advices from friends and the soft voices from my personal guardian angels are speaking truth: It wasn't a good start from the beginning.

I have to move on.. it's will be an uphill task but its alright. I am determined.

De one with Easter Day

Hallelujah

In courtesy of "Go out and Play"

It's unclear why this excitement and glee whenever I greet "Happy Easter Day" to others! Perhaps its the connotation from "Happy" or exuberant images of chocolate easter-eggs and bunny rabbits that swirled in my mind.

I accepted my ex-colleague's invitation to her special easter service held by her church which recently relocated to their new-bought property at Suntec City. Was bewildered by the large seating capacity. The stage was longer (when compared to the previous)... way much longer with gigantic LED screens that laid across the entire length of the stage. Perhaps its a special service, perhaps a combined service, you should have seen the crowd, it's almost equivalent to a densely filled national stadium. No kidding.

In courtesy of Ed Unloaded

The people who introduced themselves (mostly cell-group members) were even more friendly and hospitable than expected. It puts me to shame. I guess, being in church really develop one's character and self-confidence, in turn, enables you to carry yourself well and expand your social life. What's more, it's a blessing to be involved as part of a large "family". A family that gathers every week to share a similar course. Charming. Look around, admirable people dress well, speak well and hold their poise well.

If you're to ask, I love the distinct service, particularly the play "Centurion" exclusively put up by the drama ministry. Really awesome. The plots intertwined stories of different timelines. Marcus who was betrayed by his comrade Titus, sabotaged and was left to die in the battlefield. The battled and seriously wounded Marcus was kept prison-of-war for 3 years before escaping and was discovered and saved by Jesus Christ. Upon recovery, Marcus sort to get back to his then-fiancee Aurelia who was convinced her lover was dead and married by the treacherous Titus. Devastated to learn of Titus' betrayal, Marcus sought revenge on Titus. The Emperor discovers this and puppet-ted Marcus to prosecute Jesus in exchange for his parol of his crime. Jesus was crucifixed and resurrected Devastated from being used by the Emperor, losing Aurelia and his child (who were sent away by Titus) and overwhelmed with remorse for turning his back on his savior, the berserk-ed Marcus decides to take his own life. Fortunately, Jesus prevented Marcus and healed him and reunited him with Aurelia and their child. Touching story filled with love I must say. Albeit the creative mix, I think the messages that the drama was bring across were:

1) do not unto others what others have hurt you
2) understand the grace of Jesus who died to purge our sins
3) the underlying story behind Easter Day

In courtesy of CityWideHarvestChurch.org

All in all, I felt really glad. It's not just the skit, or that they had performed my favourite upbeat Christian song "He's Alive", I guess, its the joy of being somewhere, doing something that bears meaning and appropriate for the occasion. I mean, what's more fulfilling to attend service on Easter holidays?! Haha! 

De one with 22 Days Later

2+2 = 22, not 4.

No joke. I'm being stalked by someone who lurks within my shadows. The intangible stalker has a first name "bore", last name "dom" a.k.a. the "silent killer" (C.Kwek, 2011). Before I go on to elaborate further, here's a few pages from my post-resignation survival manual (which I believe most are eager and intrigued to read).

Page 1: MBS

Due to unforeseen external circumstances, I have literally donated a few bucks to Sands. Non-qualifying donation for tax purposes somemore. Ironically, what disappointed me most wasn't the financial loss. It was something more.. intangible. Everything was planned out and honest speaking, I was really really really looking forward to it. Not only because of the significance inaugural to my first day of temporary unemployment, it was the progressive movement towards bond-building and gleeful hair-let down, novice luxury hotel experience. Never had I expected the unexpected. The flame on the candle was pinched off just 11 hours after the light of day. 

I didn't want to but admit defeat.. My weariness, disappointment caused some weeping. I felt really tangled. If Leticia Boningo has to read my mind: "Err.. you know, like Rapunzler (Rapunzel).. the Mickey mouse one (points to her disney t-shirt). Tangled. So sud (sad)."

Pages 6 - 10: Hong Kong affair

It's my third visit to Hong Kong. Only difference, I'm traveling solo (first was in 2006, to Melbourne). Well, company was different, not with good friend Mohan, not with colleagues but my bestest friend, Clara. Shopped and had bountiful of dim sum for one full night and day. The following two days to Disneyland (yes, I never got sick of the place simply because it's feels so happy over there!) and further last minute shopping. Albeit feeling sick of label-shopping, I touch my heart and satisfyingly endorsed this trip was a fulfilling one. Apart from roaming foreign land was someone close and fulfillment of trying "chicken rice" onboard Jetstar flight, I ventured further into my indulgence in food, accentuating passion for watches, better found sense of navigation and finally, embracing a sweet-surprise that arrived during the most unexpected hours.

I am not an atheist. I do believe there's the presence of God or a higher power. Fair enough, he works miracles in his own way. That being said, honestly speaking, I don't really know how to pray or even if I did (during times of trouble or good needs), doubts sneak in from the back of my head on whether I did it correctly? Not consoling myself but after-all, I guess religion prayers are subjective. Like presents, sincerity matters, regardless the means or end product. While certain things are difficult severing ties with, I prayed with might. Perhaps the angels have neglected me overseas, someone had better plans and something befall on me. A new seed had sprouted and bloom. It was truly what I needed more than anything. 

Page 14: Hospital

A distant relative called to inform us of a departing kin. The situation became serious and got us really worried. It left me with no choice but to recall my aunt and uncle who had embarked on their trip abroad a few days before. Never really like the idea of visiting hospitals.. majorly because currently, I found myself admitting to hospital for major personal health reasons, not to mention the considerable time "wasted" while pending consultation and treatment phase. Yet, family calls. I had to be around, even if it wasn't a close relative. At current, it's a relief the storms have passed and situation turned out for the better. The kin survived the ordeal and is transferred out from ICU to normal patient's ward. Thank goodness.

Page 22: Good Friday

Apparently, things ain't as bad as they seemed. People kept asking how am I coping? Found a new job? While most find my current carefree life enviable, it isn't a rosy picture completely. It gets bored during some days. Yup. Stalked by "boredom", stubborn old fool, tagging along ever hour I spent alone at home or during sports. Furthermore, there's only some much I could do everyday. Other days not so. Especially today as I expect good company. There are certain personal matters to attend to at hand. Job search? Plans are in view. Execution to event next month. Although I'm not religiously bounded, I suppose I'll be blessed and His grace precipitates to tide me through the deserve and undeserved.

Happy Good Friday to all!

De one with Silver Lining

Sunny out and rain in

When it comes to everything, identify the strength and weaknesses, costs and benefits. The ultimate goal is simple: To maximise goals and cut your losses. 

I guess it's not mutual anymore. Alot of people are screaming "pull out"! But I pressed on, hoping the silver lining might appear just fine. "Patience is a virtue. Good things come to those who wait." No?

And you? I seriously don't know what's going on. A thousands burning questions but it doesn't matter now. Or my senses tell me so.

in courtesy of chewie2008~

The best things are not to reminisce on what's lost. But moving forward and having the grace to wish people the best in their future endeavors. If its meant to be, it will be. If not, it's best to put yourself together and part ways.

De one with Have's

1 day before the last

There are always two sides to everything. The last time I felt the replica of this quasy feeling was when I graduated. You know, moving on and out from a place I'm super-accustomed to, where relationships are built, to somewhere else albeit I'll harvest better prospects. It's pretty sad.

Of course, we move on for the better. I guess I'll just have to stop all these clatters in my mind and walk bravely towards the exit to green pastures. Stationeries I used, my hand-writting, the chair I used to sit, relationships built can be left, memories and knowledge shall be packed away.

I know for the past few weeks I've been angst, complained and plus a tiny bit of whining. In fact, I was wishing time to past by faster! Guess the rush is over, I end up feeling dreadful. What an irony!

Well, wish me luck! Gain some, lose some. Omg.