De one with Jason V Dislikees (Part I)

DISCLAIMER: The following characters and topics are for personal leisure reading. Like the Noose, believing and exercising what I blog here is like believing we can survive without air. Any real-life resembler is purely coincidence.

*Commercial break*

Today I put down my studies until the night because I woke up late. Morning rush. Accompanied my aunt to fetch ah-ma whose discharged from the hospital. Rightfully, we ought to have left the hospital by 1pm. Turns out nearing 4 pm did the pharmacist came to dispatch and explained a shockingly bundle of medications and this stupid x-ray when we could have just read all the instructions printed on the appointment letter itself. I can read ok..

So, NEXT time you're at the hospital, it's advisable not to turn up too early. If there's a delay, press hard by enquiring from the nurses!

Brought to you be a "dun-mess-around with me" experienced associate.

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JLR (Jason "Lor" Rapport)
22108

Jason (plaintiff) V Dislikees (defendants)

Jog!
(everybody rise)

In pursuant of Jection 89 (1985), "Any legal person of whom, by any effect and/or impact of the five senses, results and/or affect and/or derived from, be it emotionally and/or psychologically, or are uncomfortable and/or any distress and/or unpleasant equivalent, to another, shall be liable for inclusion into Jason's charter of "people I dislike the most". The plaintiff hereby brings action upon the unpleasant, undesirable defendants.

After a tedious series of cross-examinations, fierce debates and heavy-showered media coverage, we have approached the finale session (well, maybe not the last, who knows.. else there wouldn't need be a Part 2 right) for the case(es).

Your Jonour. Jury of different personalities of Jason, Jason, Jason and Jason. I (J. Angelious Honorable) represent my client Jason, the plaintiff, to present the charges my client had raise against the accused behind these chocolate bars. Right here in Mr Lek's brain, left wing, compartment 752.

(dimming his 99,999,999 candela Halo)

Our first accused, Mr Backstabber is a secret-killer, an accomplice of Mr Politics (whom got off the trial due to insufficient evidence and limited spaces in "charter"). We are very well aware, during our trial, that the accused always strike from behind his victims. He has attained the ability of omnipresence, apart from our religion-believed God. Commits crimes in offices, schools and minds of brainless bimbos. His weapon is none other than knife-sharpened malicious lies and whistle (whistle-blowing)...

Objection your Jonour! The prosecuting lawyer is making a rhetorical closing against my client. (does the "Madarka" action with his fiery fork)

*knock knock knock* Please refrain yourself and once more I'm gonna have to ask you to put away your burning fork, it's gonna cause fire hazard around here, J.D Despicable. J.A Hon, do proceed with your closing?

Actually, your Jonour, Jury, I have nothing more to say about the accused. Mr Despicable just didn't let me complete my sentence with a fullstop.

(Before the Jonour even gesture for the defense lawyer to speak..)

(.. the defense lawyer intervened. Notice he couldn't pronounce "h" properly)
Thank you your Jonour! My dear Jury and your Jonour of course, as you've known, I'm J. Devilish Despicable and I represent my fellous clients, too many of them.. i mean those befind the chocolate bars. Wifout furter ado, I strongly disagree wif what the goodie goodie Glowing halo-head sprouts about my client.

Mr Backstabber is a "close"-cousin of Mr Straightforward who doesn't face any charges for fis outspokeness. Ya. I bet you to reconsider teir similarities. Bof are merely speaking the trutf. I mean, most of the time, when my client plays wif fis whistle, pee pee.. Witfout someone to whisteblow, do you think the charities frauds be breakaway into the light?

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Err.. If God have made worse things, one of them would have to be Mr Inconsiderate, our 2nd accused, the senseless person. Through his actions of low morality and selfishness, it is obvious he's completely ignorant towards how people and living things around him feels. Perhaps ignorant might not even describe the full intensity of his crimes. You ask yourself, (staring into the eyes of Mr Worrisome Jason and Mr Nice Jason), do you wish for such a person be let off?

Lemme refres you on the meaning of ignorant. It means "lack of training". I think for my second (most-blur, ya, keep those gratitunous gifts coming) client, Mr Inconsiderate, he just need some rehabitary training ay.. Including fim into the charter would constitute a condemnity towards a forgetful caracter like his, which I m sure you'd agree, would be unfair.

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Without Mr Fhypocrite, I think all business would fave failed. My beloved Jury and of course, your Jonour, it is people like my third defendant would provides job opportunities in the marketing sectors since they are, by at large, the inspirational role model for our sales-assistants chiong-sters and some others.

I believe you would agree it doesn't hurt to have some compliments and white-lies from My Fhypocrite. More than never, fis golden words of encouragement are mistaken to be forgery and pretendence. Omg.

Sweetie, I mean, prosecuting lawyer, we shall now hear your closing for the third accused.

Thank you your Jonour. Thank you for the remindful closing for his client. Your Jonour and Jury, the third accused, Mr Hyprocrite, is a master of bluff. He conceals the truth and creates a false image of himself. Sometimes, collaborating with Mr Backstabber, to cause fatalness on selected victims.

I hereby raise Jection 21A which protects our minority, the Naive-thinkers. Shouldn't we consider that behaviour of Mr Hyprocrite would detriment the minority's well-being, given they impressioned what people portray themselves to be? Psychologist have proof that we judge a person when we first meet, entirely on our first impression of their outer appearance and behaviour. Of course, it is rebuttable that as time passes, we should have discover the shortcomings of such hyprocrisy. Wouldn't that constitute more disguishing around us. Why live a life so fake?!

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I got nothing to say about the client. Personally, I detest Undue Inflencer. Damn, if it wasn't the fallen angel's instructions, I'd have not taken this client man.

I guess that speaks it all.. all of us dislikes undue Inflencers. These people think they have power over us because of sheer authority. With great power comes great responsibilities, not more self-flaming and induglence into other people's misery. We should have the fundermental right to live as we were decide ourselves to be. Just as long as we oblige by our morale rules, we should be fine. Buzz off, you stupid, I mean, xtras!

Jog adjourned till date to be confirm.

Jog!

(everybody rise)

The proceedings have commenced and the Jog has heard both lawyers' closings for 3 of the defendants. Wonder what would be their final sentences? And what date would the jog adjourn till? Stay tune to find out!