De one with Coverboy Debut

Never before

Had nothing to do, so I picked up my Omnia camera, flexed a few facial expressions and took some fun shots. If there's one thing to cheer you readers up, hope this is it! Don't puke. Hehe.







































































































Maybe some not so fun... Anyway, how was this one-minuted debut? Man, my face feels so tired now, you better say it's good! Lol

De one with Planning

Brain-activated

I'm contemplating what to do after my exams! Man. Not that I'm complaining about my life. I have a happy life. Just.. need more excitement in it!

During our last coffee chat, Mohan confessed he had to leave for London. No, not temporary. Five months. Puff! There goes my best shopping buddy. Clara would most likely be working. Max.. Haha, no use counting. Everybody's away!

Which is why I should find something or some place to go too! Wahaha, I think a getaway this coming CNY.. or backpack? What do you think? Gonna make my second time travelling solo even better! Haven't really decided on but hey, the beach's what I have in mind.

Late afternoon, I was watching this fashion gala. Something associated with a charity event in support of the founding by the Princess of Wales. They had live bands, "musicians" they call it and models cat-walk on the V shaped stage. The stage display was spectacular: Backdrop screens, in the middle was a heart-awowing, ernomous chandelier-like curtain-raise. It was damn creative! Not forgetting the glamourous clothes they wear. And I though to myself, I've gotta be part of this. The question is how?

Given my height, I can't do modelling. I guess I'll be well-off attending galas. I don't like crowds. But I guess I'm very much addicted or attracted to attending functions. Coz, I love to be in my best attire, glamouring people.

Ok, let's not think too much. Back to studies now! Convincing myself I love accountancy. Weeeee!!!

De one with Nothing but Means so Much

Brighter, better

I don't know why but I came across this comic strip, found on NH's blog. Hope he wouldn't mind me posting the same material here?

(in courtesy of NH and universal press)

It's not wrong to get emotional at times. Of course, not excessively. People who have known and met me can justify I look nothing as pessimistic or depressed as I might sound in my messages and blog.

We get emotional because we feel lost when there's no one being there for us. For me, I guess. It explains thoroughly why I looked back into the past. It is primarily because by then, there were people who cared for me relentlessly, especially when I've had too much or too overwhelmed to be self-taken care of.

I believe this is what everyone on Earth has in common. The above comic strip illustrates it all.
:)

De one with Clarification

Coming clean

I had a real conversation with a friend. I feel it is imperative for me to clarify. I'm NOT an emo freak. Oh well.. Just living my life to the fullest.

Wtf. Anything wrong with that? Take it, no, you don't leave it.

De one with Jason V Dislikees (Part I)

DISCLAIMER: The following characters and topics are for personal leisure reading. Like the Noose, believing and exercising what I blog here is like believing we can survive without air. Any real-life resembler is purely coincidence.

*Commercial break*

Today I put down my studies until the night because I woke up late. Morning rush. Accompanied my aunt to fetch ah-ma whose discharged from the hospital. Rightfully, we ought to have left the hospital by 1pm. Turns out nearing 4 pm did the pharmacist came to dispatch and explained a shockingly bundle of medications and this stupid x-ray when we could have just read all the instructions printed on the appointment letter itself. I can read ok..

So, NEXT time you're at the hospital, it's advisable not to turn up too early. If there's a delay, press hard by enquiring from the nurses!

Brought to you be a "dun-mess-around with me" experienced associate.

--------

JLR (Jason "Lor" Rapport)
22108

Jason (plaintiff) V Dislikees (defendants)

Jog!
(everybody rise)

In pursuant of Jection 89 (1985), "Any legal person of whom, by any effect and/or impact of the five senses, results and/or affect and/or derived from, be it emotionally and/or psychologically, or are uncomfortable and/or any distress and/or unpleasant equivalent, to another, shall be liable for inclusion into Jason's charter of "people I dislike the most". The plaintiff hereby brings action upon the unpleasant, undesirable defendants.

After a tedious series of cross-examinations, fierce debates and heavy-showered media coverage, we have approached the finale session (well, maybe not the last, who knows.. else there wouldn't need be a Part 2 right) for the case(es).

Your Jonour. Jury of different personalities of Jason, Jason, Jason and Jason. I (J. Angelious Honorable) represent my client Jason, the plaintiff, to present the charges my client had raise against the accused behind these chocolate bars. Right here in Mr Lek's brain, left wing, compartment 752.

(dimming his 99,999,999 candela Halo)

Our first accused, Mr Backstabber is a secret-killer, an accomplice of Mr Politics (whom got off the trial due to insufficient evidence and limited spaces in "charter"). We are very well aware, during our trial, that the accused always strike from behind his victims. He has attained the ability of omnipresence, apart from our religion-believed God. Commits crimes in offices, schools and minds of brainless bimbos. His weapon is none other than knife-sharpened malicious lies and whistle (whistle-blowing)...

Objection your Jonour! The prosecuting lawyer is making a rhetorical closing against my client. (does the "Madarka" action with his fiery fork)

*knock knock knock* Please refrain yourself and once more I'm gonna have to ask you to put away your burning fork, it's gonna cause fire hazard around here, J.D Despicable. J.A Hon, do proceed with your closing?

Actually, your Jonour, Jury, I have nothing more to say about the accused. Mr Despicable just didn't let me complete my sentence with a fullstop.

(Before the Jonour even gesture for the defense lawyer to speak..)

(.. the defense lawyer intervened. Notice he couldn't pronounce "h" properly)
Thank you your Jonour! My dear Jury and your Jonour of course, as you've known, I'm J. Devilish Despicable and I represent my fellous clients, too many of them.. i mean those befind the chocolate bars. Wifout furter ado, I strongly disagree wif what the goodie goodie Glowing halo-head sprouts about my client.

Mr Backstabber is a "close"-cousin of Mr Straightforward who doesn't face any charges for fis outspokeness. Ya. I bet you to reconsider teir similarities. Bof are merely speaking the trutf. I mean, most of the time, when my client plays wif fis whistle, pee pee.. Witfout someone to whisteblow, do you think the charities frauds be breakaway into the light?

--------

Err.. If God have made worse things, one of them would have to be Mr Inconsiderate, our 2nd accused, the senseless person. Through his actions of low morality and selfishness, it is obvious he's completely ignorant towards how people and living things around him feels. Perhaps ignorant might not even describe the full intensity of his crimes. You ask yourself, (staring into the eyes of Mr Worrisome Jason and Mr Nice Jason), do you wish for such a person be let off?

Lemme refres you on the meaning of ignorant. It means "lack of training". I think for my second (most-blur, ya, keep those gratitunous gifts coming) client, Mr Inconsiderate, he just need some rehabitary training ay.. Including fim into the charter would constitute a condemnity towards a forgetful caracter like his, which I m sure you'd agree, would be unfair.

--------

Without Mr Fhypocrite, I think all business would fave failed. My beloved Jury and of course, your Jonour, it is people like my third defendant would provides job opportunities in the marketing sectors since they are, by at large, the inspirational role model for our sales-assistants chiong-sters and some others.

I believe you would agree it doesn't hurt to have some compliments and white-lies from My Fhypocrite. More than never, fis golden words of encouragement are mistaken to be forgery and pretendence. Omg.

Sweetie, I mean, prosecuting lawyer, we shall now hear your closing for the third accused.

Thank you your Jonour. Thank you for the remindful closing for his client. Your Jonour and Jury, the third accused, Mr Hyprocrite, is a master of bluff. He conceals the truth and creates a false image of himself. Sometimes, collaborating with Mr Backstabber, to cause fatalness on selected victims.

I hereby raise Jection 21A which protects our minority, the Naive-thinkers. Shouldn't we consider that behaviour of Mr Hyprocrite would detriment the minority's well-being, given they impressioned what people portray themselves to be? Psychologist have proof that we judge a person when we first meet, entirely on our first impression of their outer appearance and behaviour. Of course, it is rebuttable that as time passes, we should have discover the shortcomings of such hyprocrisy. Wouldn't that constitute more disguishing around us. Why live a life so fake?!

--------

I got nothing to say about the client. Personally, I detest Undue Inflencer. Damn, if it wasn't the fallen angel's instructions, I'd have not taken this client man.

I guess that speaks it all.. all of us dislikes undue Inflencers. These people think they have power over us because of sheer authority. With great power comes great responsibilities, not more self-flaming and induglence into other people's misery. We should have the fundermental right to live as we were decide ourselves to be. Just as long as we oblige by our morale rules, we should be fine. Buzz off, you stupid, I mean, xtras!

Jog adjourned till date to be confirm.

Jog!

(everybody rise)

The proceedings have commenced and the Jog has heard both lawyers' closings for 3 of the defendants. Wonder what would be their final sentences? And what date would the jog adjourn till? Stay tune to find out!

De one with "Yeay"

Said so

Today's a rather unproductive day. All my efforts in arriving punctually at TPY library went down the drain. All because of the noise pollution from the elevator renovation and this err.. weird guy (think he's not straight) who deprived me of my eraser. I only lent it to him thinking it was for his temporary use. Turns out, the eraser was with him through my entire stay there. Omg. If I were to illustrate his usage on a Product possibility curve (PPC), he'd most likely be outside the convexed area (on the outmost right from the zero axis), i.e. over-utilisation!!

Since it was such a flopped study visit, I decided not to waste time, packed up and left for TTSH to visit my ah-ma. She looked lonely la.. I felt it'd be good for me to visit her, making use of my availabe free time since I'm on leave. Normally, I'm always occupied at work, thus hardly interact with her. She didn't eat. Wasn't supposed to since she had so many scans today.

I met mama at the hospital. We left at 2 (visiting hours ends), did hasty shopping at Fairprice Xtra. Omg, I just couldn't believe it, it's supper crowded. Accordingly to mama, it's senior citizens 2% rebate day. No wonder.

Came back, I was eating my lunch. Tuna Ciabatta Melt from Starbucks.. my favourite..yummy. Didn't take me long to be glued to the TV. Oh no.. I did some job la.. cleared my accounting of this stack of receipts. I reckon the pile was around 6cm tall. So much.. expenditure. Sigh. Turns out, the expenses levels are increasing month after month. Die la.. like that how to save for my Hume Avenue!?

Evening came, gave the dog a bath. Else, she stinks. And of course, mopped my room. Getting dusty. Never study but proud I accomplished other chores. I guess it's excusable.

Ok back to studies for now.. next blog: Ten people whom Jason dislikes the most.. be sure to catch it. Not a blog to be missed!

De one with If Given a Choice

Dedicated to the universal Gods

Evening, mama shared some news about my granny's condition when I arrived home from my visit at the hospital. The doctor had a discussion with my uncle and her in the afternoon. He says there is a possibility that ah ma's bone marrow might have been dysfunction. It probably explains why her blood level is always falling below average despite infusion of 3 packets of blood over the past few days.

The doctor would seek the cardiologists' opinion, have ah ma undergo scans and subsequently, endorscopy (inserting tube with miniprobe to view the inside of the body), which ah ma objected.

The news came with a thud. It was my heart which sank immediately. My mind turned cold. I couldn't help but unleash the fear within me..

During shower, my thoughts ran into chaos, a million voices wailing "It (departure of another family) is not going to happen! I wouldn't allow" repeatedly, over and over again. Heart ache like mad.

I hate myself. I hate for not being in control of such events. Although I keep telling myself I shouldn't think of the worst, I just couldn't help being crumpled by the fact that she's not recovering. Now this.. it's like never-ending fatal medical problems affecting my loved ones.

Can't believe I'm sobbing as I blog. Silly silly me.. If I could, I'd forbear whatever life I have for my future, euthanise myself and transpose all my remaining life and health to them. Seriously, I don't mind, I wouldn't even have any split second thoughts about this!

De one with Feeling Better

Ok, not really better, maybe just a little

I couldn't take it anymore. Went downstairs to the SPC kiosk to get a Magnum Vanilla. Cost me $3.90. Guess it was worth it coz the rich chocolate coating improved my mood to "green" scale.

Speaking of dinner, yesterday's dinner was different. We had Teochew Muiy (Teochew Porridge). Did some improvision for the dishes since we couldn't make up our mind for dinner when Mama (my aunt) asked before she left for her marketing in the morning.

As you can see, (clockwise, starting from bottom right), there's my bowl of porridge, white-celery, fish & chicken from Long John Silver, the bacon-hotdogs were Jasmine's, there's Jasmine's requested chow-sum-xu, lunceon meat (its pork, I dun like this) and on top there's salt eggs (yucks). I requested for scrumble eggs (which is obviously not in this picture), something I must have when I eat porridge. Dinner was ok.. different from the one I had at my office nearby stall which sold more "qing dan" (bland) teochew muiy.

Since I am eating at home. I didn't have to respect tradition. Did away with pepper but I bought this to add some salty taste to my meal.

De one with Mr Grumpy

"Leave me alone" day

Who says Accountants ain't fun? Who says Auditors are a bunch of people to be feared about? Why eh, is it because accounting's always based on historical events? So are the facts which lawyers, forensic scientists, policemen, archeologists are basing on to carry on with their job. I mean an event has to occur before it becomes facts and subsequent info to be exacted, derived from such facts to prove useful for us in our decision making. Life's full of decision making: Judges based on this prior committing someone liable for a crime, our annual reports has to be true and fair for investors else they'd definitely be worst than the broke Lehman Brothers' share-holders.

What's wrong with me? I seriously don't know. Probably the period of the month? Great..now that I mentioned that, alot of ladies out there must be offended by me.

I awfully need a break. I need a pat on my shoulder which has become so tensed up, the heart's tied up in complicated knots, with all the arteries glutted with emptiness. My mental's weary and worn out. Pessimistism, frustration cloud overhead. I bet if you x-ray me, you'd easily spot a black-hole in my heart, just 0.7cm from the center of my heart.

All of a sudden, I felt so imprisoned from anybody. More specifically as though a mobile phone without any signal for connectivity. That's how bad I am. It can get as worse as a drought-sickened little boy who's dehydrated and his condition nearing the brim of unconsciousness. With every faint heartbeat, every functioning brain cells in him desperately yearning and praying for rain to fall from the sky.

"Hand me the world on a silver platter and what good would it be.
With no one who shares, no one who truly cares for me"

- Alicia Keys, If I Ain't Got You

Where are my chocolates? Din't buy any. Every night I just lie on my bed, with my silent handphone on my side, listen to angel Jason whispering "tomorrow would be better" into my right ear, devil Jason pops out at my left ear, rebut sarcastically "ya, continue lying to yourself". What would I do? Bury myself in my pillow and weep.

Sometimes it appears to me, really screw up life I'm leading man.. and what? No handyman even pass me a spanner, not even Popeye is willing to offer me a can of spinach for me to get stronger for the moment. Anyway, I hate spinach. Prefer broccoli.

I heard news my ahma was overjoyed when her true grandson (my Mummy's elder brother's son) went to visit her with his girlfriend. Hai.. what's compared to my visit 3 days and that day when I was dizzy and still went to see her. Hai. Reminded I don't have a loved one. Makes me doubt if anybody cares about me.

As the years pass, I couldn't help but witness the family members at home become less and lesser. It's as though the divine has used his eraser and removed the family figures of the my family tree. What? Did I guess correctly? He's calling them to his Home Garden (reckoned with global warming) due to shortage of deaths because of advanced medical science which have prolonged life? My family because I'm Jason which means Healer? Pls.. that's just ridculous!

Remember we were thought to summarise in school. I hate that because I didn't master until I grew up. In short, this blog is Mr nice boy turning grumpy, growling if anyone cares for me.

"Trying hard to reach out, but when I try to speak out, felt like no one could hear me.
Wanted to belong here, but something felt so wrong here.
So I pray, I could breakaway"

- Kelly Clarkson, Breakaway