De one with "I understand how you felt" finally

Sunny

Since yesterday, i've been thinking.. about the failed relationship, opposing differences and feelings, thinkings between me and -A-. But, most of all, i'd really sincerely, apologise to AY. I really think you're a very nice and wonderful person. However, i still can't sort out my feelings. Like you've said, i'm really stuck in my past.

Although everyone would advise or even to a point, reprimand me to move on. No matter how much excuses or whatever pushing pursuasions, my tears still keeps flowing... heart keeps bleeding... mind keeps blurring up. Reason is one and simple... I really did love -A- alot.

I admit some of the things i've done were very stubborn and persistent. I admit I was too rash. I admit I was too foolish and gullible to go against our odds. But have you ever asked WHY?

Today, i went IKEA with my former campmate, our responsible and friendly gunnery specialist, Zhen Ze. After having went down to SIM (Singapore Institution of Management) for payment for our uni course. Which will be commencing on 31st July.

Everytime i went IKEA, flashbacks emerge in my mind. How we met your friends Derius and Kelly. That time we dine with Chris, V and gang... Lunch with Dexter.. Sigh.. I was on the bus, on my way back home. Listening to ipod but me mind was wondering off. I thought of the present lonely me... about our past.. I nearly cried. What the fark is wrong with me.

I shouldn't be doing all these. Shdn't even mention because I was too caught up, too obstinate.
Now, I understand how you felt finally.

How you used to like a person. Then after that draw your distance between them. You don't wish to hurt the person. Yet he's so superbly nice to you that you don't know how to reject.
I understand how you felt finally.

-A-, I love you. As much as I dislike you. Because... you disregarded and forsakened me.