De one with Relationship

Windy and sunny

After a 3hr lecture at campus and I was on the bus which takes me home. I suddenly come to realise more about what Vance told me before. That couples should do things which benefits the relationship, rather than for their individual selves.

Sweet was messaging me, proposing to make some changes in Sweet's life. Well, my natural reaction was being to feel inferior. That if Sweet underwent the changes, Sweet would become more attractive and that Sweet might just realise one day that I'm not good enough and might end up leaving me. That arouses my inferiority. Of course, I think about it. Partly, it's because I wanna stop all these "break-up" prophecy which is a form of pessismism (gets Sweet on the nerves). So I replied Sweet: "well, if it doesn't change much of you then go ahead".

In less than a minute after I replied, it occur to me to review what I've sent.
I did what I do best, focus, listen and think in an unprejudice, open-mind way. I came to realise I was being very selfish. And unsupportive towards Sweet. Simply because I'm afraid of losing Sweet, i've created a sort of restriction which might made Sweet happier and being able to achieve something.

I sent another message to Sweet : "nah, if it doesn't jeopardise anything, i should and i will support you in whatever you wish to do". In hope that it's strong enough to encourage Sweet. I did this because I want the greater good for the relationship which we share. Being supportive and encouraging are little ways to maintain a relationship. So it will last forever.

It's about putting aside what we want for ourselves or how and what we decided for our partners to be, and considering the benefits for the relationship itself which will eventually, most of the time, make both parties happy.

Of course, this is not the only way to make a successful relationship. There are other factors like compromises and sacrifices to make a wonderful relationship. Even though, definately this has a percentage which MAY contribute to a long-term lovely relationship. (Omg! Why are I writing in academic style!?! It's my blog! It's supposed to be MY PERSPECTIVE!) hehe